Go for the Duck

Go for the Duck, Go for the Duck Go for the Duck! That is what I kept telling myself as the sleet and the cold pierced my nose and my ears and my body. It was so dark, it was so crowded. I was suddenly scared. Scared of the sweep buses, scared of the crowds, scared of the walkers, scared of my lack of training the past month due to the weather and the holidays and my own demons. As I approached the first mile marker, I was terrified of getting hurt.

I did not expect to be terrified of getting hurt. However, I had not expected this terrible weather, the sleet and the wet grounds and at mile one I had been zig zagging in and out of walkers and other runners, jumping onto the slick grass and onto the road and dodging plastic bags and other random pieces of clothing that were being tossed in the middle of the road and on the side of the road. People were cutting me off as they passed me, I was cutting people off as I passed them. WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON? I suddenly felt like I was trapped in my favorite 80's video game frogger!

It is dark, it is wet, it is cold, I am just starting out and I can not run in a straight line, I can not keep my pace and I am terrified I am going to either slip and fall or fall from tripping on a plastic bag in the road or on someones coat and this is breaking my focus. Suddenly I realize I can see in front of me the first glimpse of the Magic Kingdom gates and the sun is starting to rise and now I am facing a new challenge, my emotions and my tears.

I had always been afraid of the sweep buses, but all I could do was start running, run the fastest and hardest I could and GO FOR THE DUCK! I was filled with adrenaline before the race, but did not expect to feel the gut wrenching emotions I was feeling while running. I LOVE DISNEY for so many reasons. I love it for the memories. I cherish my childhood memories of visiting with my father who passed away when I was only 14 of cancer , I cherish Disney because of all of the wonderful vacations we have had with my children and especially with my autistic son. I am so grateful to Disney for their efforts in helping people with disabilities feel excepted and taken care of and valued; something that sadly that is hard to achieve outside of Disney. Most of all I love Disney for helping me to appreciate the important things in life, love, and family and relationships and friends. I know I am getting emotional, but running is emotional for me. At this point, I started gushing and flowing tears of joy, tears of pride, tears of pain, tears of fear, just tears. I had worked so hard for this and when I passed under the Magic Kingdom arches with the monorail tracks at my side, it suddenly hit me for the first time. I am really doing this, it is here.

I know, I am silly, but I had been talking the talk, walking the walk for so many months and now it was really here, this was the moment, this was my moment and at that moment as I passed under the gates, I knew,that I was going to do it.

I wanted to make my kids proud of me, I wanted to inspire other people to reach for goals, to believe the impossible to work for something, chase a dream go after it and feel the joy of accomplishment. Here, I am still a heffalump, an overweight 30 something mom of four and I was running a 13.1 mile course, in the early am, in the sleet in the freezing cold.

At that point, I felt a calm wash over me and I just ran, I did not stop, not for the characters in the Magic Kingdom although I did wave and watch and appreciate them, not for the bathroom, not for when I shed my top two layers, I just ran and ran and ran. I apologize to the poor woman whose coffee I accidentally knocked out of her hand while running up Main street. The road was too narrow and I was again weaving and her cup was over the line and my left elbow caught it and sent it sailing airborne 10 feet in front of me.

I loved running through the Magic Kingdom past the characters, over the train tracks, past the pirate ship by the water parade floats and up past the Grand Floridian. Seeing goofy in his golf cart on the side of the road was fun. Mostly, I was inspired by how many adults and children that were out on the course that early in the morning in the freezing rain and 30 degree weather to cheer for the runners.

The run back to Epcot was long and slow. The dreaded overpass that curved and inclined slowly was painful. But then the most amazing thing happened, I saw Spaceship Earth and the Epcot gate and I knew I had done it. Every long run I had when things got tough, I always imagined the "big ball" as we call it in our family in front of us. To actually know it was there and I was at mile 11 and change and I was approaching it was again a tear invoking experience. Running into Epcot while slipping and sliding on the wet pavement was one memory, I will never forget. Rounding the corner and being startled by a gospel choir before the finish was another memory I will never forget. Crossing the finish line although I know it was trite, I could not help but raise my arms above my head. I DID IT! I proudly walked and claimed my duck.

Then as I stopped running and started walking, I suddenly realized how much my legs began to hurt and thus "mommy robot" as my kids called me for the next several days was born, but Mommy Robot had her duck so the pain was replaced by pride.